Oh my, isn't it awkward

Isn't it awkward when you are talking to someone about something, and you realise that when you were referring to your relationship and deep feelings, they were referring to the game you were playing a moment before. Some crafty back tracking is needed. How awkward.

Happy boxing day...

Well that's Christmas officially over and done with! I hope you all had a good day of eating and drinking for too much, and getting given loads of presents and general happiness and high spirits and all that lovely stuff that happens at Christmas.

These are just my top 5 happy things about this Christmas:

1) How unconventional us Tooles are. We do everything about 5 hours later than everyone else on Christmas, and only have about one tradition compared to the millions a lot of people have. Ours is having this really ugly candle alight at dinner, which my dad had been lighting on Christmas day 'before he married my mother'.

2) How thoughtful my friends are... I'm not gonna pretend I needed a mug with Audrey Hepburn as a cat on the front, that I'm going to watch the Shining or The Princess Bride more than once in my life, or that a Panda shaped hand warmer is the most essential thing in my life, but those presents are the ones that made me smile the most. Oh, how I love you guys.

3) Mince pies.

4) How amazing Les Miserables is. It made me cry, which is really rare - a live performance making someone cry. From the moment the curtain was raised I has goosebumps. It's such an incredible show because of how captivating it is. The setting is so remarkably clever that you barley notice a scene change, mainly because the actual stage rotates. It was fab.

5) The realisation that I do actually get on pretty well with my family.

Well it's time for New Year now isn't it... Cannot. Wait.

2 things that annoy me, 2 things that make me happy for every one thing that annoys me

Annoyance 1: When people in shops ask you if they can help you. 5 times. NO, I am perfectly fine thank you, just like I was the second I walked into your shop when you asked me the first time.

Thing that makes me happy 1: Hand made Christmas cards, like the one my friend gave me today. It really makes me smile.

Thing that makes me happy 2: Big old man jumpers from charity shops. I'm wearing one right now. It's snuggly.

Annoyance 2: When people post on their Facebook status 'it's Christmas in two days'. I know that, dimwit.

Thing that makes me happy 3: Noah and the Whale.

Thing that makes me happy 4: Coloured pens.

Even though it's what you want, it feels like you can't have it. It's making you happy and you think it needs to stop, because things are getting too real. But hold tight, and let yourself be OK with this... maybe you even deserve it, but let's not get carried away.


I can't wait to get my first tattoo, on my ribs.

Inspire me... Please.

I think I was greedy this summer and autumn and have used up all my artistic inspiration. I open my sketch book and there's just a blank page staring back at me.

Draw something inspiring woman, now.

The theme is 'movement' and so I far I've done a few of unimpressive, unimaginative drawings and paintings. I think what I need is a mind map. A good, ol' fashioned, big arse mind map. I need to find some good music which will actually stir any kind of emotion in me, and I need a large mug of coffee. And if that doesn't work, I will do something abstract.

If you have any ideas, they will be warmly received.

The Wizard will see you now...

The snow didn't want us to go. But, try as it might, we made it, and it was amazing.

We did end up missing the first 15 minutes, but that's only the bit with the massive dragon and doesn't really matter much anyway, so it's OK.

It really gave me those tingles. The ones when you feel like you really just need to scream, and you find yourself sitting there grinning. It also made me wish I still did as many shows :( I might try and do a few in 2010. Oh, that may be the first new year resolution I've thought of!

Anyway, it was just magical. Turned into a bit of a standing ovation, which from me was for Glinda (the GA is silent), because she just made the show in my opinion. She was just great, perfect for the part. Also, Elpheba was giving it a bit of soul which made it rather interesting.

Being a dancer, my eyes were glued on the dancers in the show... Pretty much the best choreography I have ever seen; it has changed so much since I last saw it. It's all contemporary now, so is much more fitting to the show's essence... I liked it. I liked it a lot.

Oh yeah, I'm a total nerd. I think this is officially out nerding myself?

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.
Sonnet 116


But it is so nice. <3

finding the right temperature

I'm having great difficulties getting the right temperature, I can't have a hoodie on because I boil over, and now I'm cold without it on! Doesn't help that my legs are boiling because of my laptop.

My garden has been covered in snow for the last 3 days, and I'm starting to get used to it. We all had the OMFG IT'S SNOW episode, then the let's take photos of the pretty snow, followed by the I HATE SNOW IT'S SO ANNOYING. Now, I'm on pretty good terms with the snow. It's nice.


I have officially wrapped all the presents I have brought, complete with cards and ribbon. I'm embarrassingly bad at wrapping presents though, and it's quite upsetting. I really do take a lot of time and effort cutting out the paper so it's the right size, but it still ends up silly and rubbish. Oh well, thought that counts isn't it.

I went to a fancy dress party last night, and I was a reindeer. It was fun, but i am now covered in sharpie pen and I have that horrible taste in my mouth I get when I have just one toke of a cigarette which doesn't go away all day, no matter how many times I brush my teeth. It is so grim.

Also, you know that feeling you get in your chest which feels like there's a huge bird flapping it's wings inside you? I have that feeling.

That's the spirit

Thank you for your honesty, now fuck off and die.

I love Closer and Clive Owen.

Sorry, is is 'stupid remarks' day today?

Did I miss something?


I don't want to fucking invite you to my New Year's party, I've made that clear by not inviting even when you asked to be invited. So can you stop being so fake and sucking up? Right, thank you.

As for you, is that not a bit inappropriate? I never speak to you, so why the fuck would I want to tell you if I have lost my virginity? Why the fuck did you even ask me that?

AND AS FOR YOU, grow up a bit and don't pretend that me not being completely obsessed with you is a crime.


FGS.

you're not the only one with a gun, bitch.

Last night, I went to see Avatar in a pre-screening.
It has definitely been the highlight of my week - everything about it was amazing. If I had to describe it in 3 words, they would be beautiful, gripping and exciting. Really boring and cliché words, but it is the definition of gorgeous, excitement and grippingness.

You'd never of thought it, but big blue people with tentacles coming out of their hair can be really sexy. There, I've said it, I'm attracted to animated blue men. You would be if you had seen the film.

One of the best things about the film, is it really makes you think about what bastards humans can be - selfish and destructive of nature, when really, it's a lot better than we are, and just because we can chop it down doesn't make it insignificant.

Oh, just go and see the film now. It's in 3D, I'll even lend you my glasses so you don't have to buy your own. Go on.

'they're just pissing on us without even the courtesy to call it rain.'

Snow snow snow snow snow snwo swno nwos wson wons

It SNOWED today!
It wasn't heavy snow, but it was snow all the same. Although, being England, the rain clouds came along and destroyed the pretty white tops of the roofs with their big evil raindrops. evils12.

Other than this ICT lesson, and the brief snow, today has been absolutely awful. I've spent every lesson - including this one - doing absolutely nothing. I did just get to know Anna a bit better with 23 of the 50 questions you should ask someone to get to know them better. We're that little bit more connected now.

Plus, I really hope you listen to me. I admit, I'm a bit biased, but I do think I have a point.

for god's sake

what the hell is going on?

'The One'

Some people think, that because you might have been slightly vulnerable in the past to them, that they can just assume power over you whenever they want. I didn't spend the last year telling myself how much of a waste of space you are for you to come back and try to tell me the opposite. For the first time, it's not gonna work, because I do not love you and I never will again.

That is a very, very bold statement for two reasons:

1) I just insinuated I might have loved someone (calm down dear, it's a Monday afternoon)

2) I once thought this person was 'the one'. I really, really don't believe in 'the one' any more, that was a really childish labelling I gave when I was younger. I do believe that there will be one person who will make you feel more complete and special and in love than anyone else can, but that doesn't mean that there's only one person you can love and be happy with. Or that you'll even find this miraculous person. Or that you won't find them when you're in Tesco buying nappies for your 3rd child with your husband.

So, the what I'm really trying to say is, piss off.

On a happier note...

I like Marmite.

I do not love Marmite.

I do not hate Marmite.

I like Marmite a reasonable amount.

'You either love it or you hate it' is such a bad statement. It is not as simple as that.

Life isn't as simple as that.

JEEEEEZ.

'There are other things that need to be taken into account here. Like the whole spectrum of human emotion. You can't just lump everything into these two categories and then just deny everything else! '

The wise words of whoever wrote Donnie Darko.

Children of Men - spoilers ;o

Ok, so...

Children of Men. At the start, we thought, OK - it's only been on for a few minutes, it will explain itself soon.

It didn't.

But we got the jist anyway, and we're trying to save this pregnant girl. But everyone's really angry and shooting eachother, and we don't know why. What is up with that?

Then, at the end, when it was starting to be good and even 'moving', they went and ruined it with the worst ending ever. CLIVE OWEN DIES. And we still don't know why the world is so shit.

Not all bad, because Clive Owen was in it, and let's face it, he's just gorgeous. But all the same. Wtf.

http://weheartit.com/entry/314281

I'd just like to reitterate that first point of my otherwise long and pointless blog,

The Smiths.

please excuse my thoughts and I

The luck I've had can make a good man bad, so please, please, please let me get what I want this time, Lord knows it will be the first time.

the smiths

.

weheartit

I want you to get out of my head and leave me alone, but I'd miss you if you went.

If you give me all your attention and smother me with you, I would scream I couldn't breathe.

When you look straight past me into her, my mind won't let it go.

I love to want you, but I don't want to love you.

.

I care. I care because I think I have the right to care. Maybe that's the furtherest from what I have, but I care. I care, I care, I care and it's killing me.

.

The Royal Albatross can live more than sixty years but is very young and sexually immature when it begins courting. The courtship is tender but polite, perhaps lasting four years, once the birds have chosen each other they will never choose again. However, life dictates that they cannot always be together. Sometimes they have to separate for a whole year, but they always come back again to the same craggy rock where they first met to mate again. Their bond is unbreakable throughout their long lives and no matter where they travel they will always find each other.

Random Acts of Heroic Love - Danny Scheinmann (one of my favourite books I've ever read. )

.

weheartit

Oh my, OH MY

I always have a film which is way, way in the future that I'm really looking forward to. Alice in Wonderland, Tim Burton, is too close to be such my obsession, as is Toy Story 3, and I think Eclipse would just be a let down, so, Harry Potter 7 Part 1 it is. Oh my god, though, I cannot wait.

http://everythingharrypotter.tumblr.com/

LOVELOVE

P.S, you have won and you don't even realise it.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt

'There's so much that can happen at the movies, the way you touch and whisper... I love going to the movies with a girl. I love it.

'Oh and can I just say, they play fucking comercials. If I pay 10 dollars to see a movie I don't want to see a fucking comercial. CUT THAT SHIT OUT. Gaaaad.'

MARRY ME?

he's beautiful, she's gorgeous:

I approve.

The girls who have it all.

Today, as me and my friend Anna were walking through town, we saw a girl in our year, who, although it kills us to admit, is pretty much perfection in human form (in the way she looks at least). We smiled and waved, and then looked at each other with disheartened, desperate faces:

WHY DOES SHE LOOK SO GOOD ALL THE TIME.

And it's not even like she isn't clever. Or doesn't have a boyfriend.

Because she is and does.

ohhh, my.

But not to fear, our time will come.

Once we have murdered her and destroyed all evidence.

Hmmm.

She's actually a nice girl, btw. But still.

fuck this, i'm going to hogwarts

'i'm like an irregular polygon; i have all the right number of sides and corners, but i just don't really fit.'

why does adding sunglasses to something automatically make it cool?

voldemort would not be cool, even if he had sunglasses on.

queues, queues, queues

Shopping around Christmas is awful. I know this isn't exactly a ground-breaking revelation, but it is. Especially when the shops are as big as a toilet cubicle, as they are is little old WGC - constantly shuffling out of the way to let mums with big double push chairs get through.

I've been a bit rubbish this year, and left buying Christmas presents until now, when I knew it would be awful. I know what I'm getting - all but one, and that one, I am totally stuck on. I don't want to get another cliché photo album or a 'cute' little present, because I've done them all already. I also don't want to get her something boring and serious which shows no knowledge of her personality at all... Oh, the hardships of Christmas shopping.

www.averagewizard.com might be my new favourite website?

'Last night, I had a dream Lord Voldemort had a Facebook.'

Also, I have no idea what colour to decorate my room. If I just do it, I will like whatever colours I chose, it's just the point of actually doing it. I'm warming to pale colours with cream antique looking furniture, of one dark coloured wall and the rest light. Inspire meee.

5 Reasons why I'm happy this Wednesday

1) There are no scary exams that want to kill my social life coming up at my school! Horrah! This is made even better because all my other friends have exams. Bad times guys, bad times.

2) It's been raining pretty much everyday for the last two weeks. I know this should really be under 'why England sucks' but for some reason I like it. I like the sound the rain makes against the windows on my kitchen roof. I also always think, if I was a farmer, or a fish in a pond somewhere near here, I would be really happy it was raining. Maybe, in a former life, I was a farmer fish in Stanborough Lakes.

3) Finally, my dance school is doing dances to Cats in our next show. Being 15, I can now proudly call myself a 'big girl', which means I get to be in all the 'tricky' bits of the dances and wear all the best costumes. I am really looking forward to prancing around a stage with cat ears and face paint on. It's pretty much my dream.

4) Soup. It's so great. With bagels.

5) thingsweforget.blogspot.com - it's so cliché and makes me want to throw up every now and again, but generally it's rather nice.

And a sneaky number 6) I have finished my ICT course and blogger works on my school computers... Time for many, many in school blogs - I am such a rebel.

#1

It smells of sweets and flowers. And it has to best lid in the world - it's all movey and fun and flower shaped. Yum yum yum.

P.S, this is my Christmas list, expect more like this of me being greedy wanting lots of expensive presents.